To Provide Enjoyment or To Make A Difference

This weekend has really made me think. I had big plans of getting orders out and just focusing on the shop this weekend, but my day job had other plans. At 4:45pm on Friday I was sent out on a pretty sticky, sad case in which I ended up getting home at 1:30 am Saturday and making people very unhappy with me (nature of the job). Then I was up at 6:30 am and worked on the same case until just now (10:14 pm). Between 4:45pm Friday and 7pm Saturday I only had a graham cracker and a coffee. Luckily I did get a couple of hours of fam time this evening.

This case has really been an emotional roller coaster in the past two days I have cried, laughed, yelled and been completely exhausted and then all over again. It made me wonder why I do it. Its funny, working on products for Green With Envy Studios can take up a bunch of time and it's super easy to spend a whole day working on photography, or design or marketing and it flies by so fast. The same thing can be said for my day job. The difference is that I get way more enjoyment from my shop than I do from my day job. But in my day job I really feel like I am making a difference even though it is a very thankless job. But I will admit that cases like this really test my commitment to social work when I end up spending pretty much no time with my own family to try and keep other families safe but in the end the family only sees me as someone who finds enjoyment in "ruining their lives". Social work is my calling and I know it but in all honesty if running my shop could bring in the same amount I make with my day job, I feel like I just might walk away from it all.

But of course thats not a decision I have to make because my shop does not really pay the bills currently, but at least I have a creative outlet that can provide joy for other people.

Too bad I have to wake up tomorrow and continue to work this case and try and get these orders done so I can mail them on Monday.

Juggling and almost dropping the ball...